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Truthordeal's Thread on Learning How to Not Suck
07-29-2012, 04:45 PM (This post was last modified: 07-29-2012 04:45 PM by OoziHobo.)
Post: #21
RE: Truthordeal's Thread on Learning How to Not Suck
Alright, I want one of these awesome critiques for myself. So here you go... please.




As you about to see, all my "changes" happen in pencil to the printed version of the script. So this is more like my first draft/guideline.
[Spoiler]

QUADGUN Episode 5

The episode opens up with Meryl and Millie looking at the city through some binoculars.

MERYL
Inepril, you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.

MILLIE
I hear every citizen of this town is a criminal!

MERYL
I need a closer look
.

Transition to a scrolling shot of the town. Cuts to Vash at a diner.

[align=center]LITTLE BOY
Hey mom! Give me all your money or I

[Image: quadgunlogoweb-1.jpg]
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RE: Truthordeal's Thread on Learning How to Not Suck - OoziHobo - 07-29-2012 04:45 PM



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